Horrible Gig

15 Mar

With all the incredible science we have out there, there’s still no way of knowing when you’re gonna get sick. Whether it’s a common cold or the flu, we all wish we could prepare for that horrible day we’re about to have. No one likes to be sick, but what makes it even worse is when you have to work–regardless of how you feel. Having said that, here’s a story of me playing a gig while sick and how it became one of my most insane and ridiculous shows I can recall.

I had a 101 degree temperature and could barely breathe through my nose, but I had previously booked myself to play a corporate event and as they say, “the show must go on”. Even though I was barely able to exit my bed, I knew I had to tough it out and play anyway.

The nice part of the story was that the corporate event was at a very luxurious resort, so even though I was sick to the gills, I would be playing in a comfortable environment with no other problems/distractions to complicate matters more….but I was wrong.

I arrived at the resort early, literally dragging my equipment and myself in to find out where I needed to set up. As it turns out, this was an outside gig and I was asked to set up by a pool at this resort–right next to a hovering swarm of blood-sucking mosquitos and nats–just waiting for fresh prey to drain the life out of.

So with a temperature of 101 and a host of parasite swarming me, I set up for the show and began playing when the corporate players arrived. I’m 5 minutes into my show and I can’t tell you which was worse–the illness I was enduring or the army of bugs biting/crawling/devouring on me–daring me to swat them while I played songs for the group of corporate big wigs looking to be entertained.

It was torture! Every song I played came with a brief battle of trying to remain standing (because of my illness) and the assault I was enduring from this swarm of insects, preying on my weakened body. If I’m being honest, I sounded like shit, because I had a head cold for the ages and on top of that, I couldn’t play a song for 15 seconds without stopping and swatting at some creature that was biting into my skin.

Eventually, the corporate people began to take notice. Many of them tried sympathizing with me and my obvious predicament. “These mosquitoes are awful, aren’t they? They’re biting me too!” Then they’d walk away–as if saying that to me somehow evened the score.

One corporate “Mother Teresa” went so far as to find me some bug repellent (God bless his soul), but to put the icing on the cake, I ended up spraying it in my mouth.

So let’s do a quick talley–I was trying to play a show while being beyond ill, I was being eaten alive by mosquitoes and now, I had a lethal amount of bug spray in my mouth!

Eventually, it ended and I was mercifully sent home to have nightmares of this horrible gig. But you know what makes this story even more sad? If the same gig were offered to me today and I knew I would be sick, covered with blood-sucking bugs with a chemically-life-threatening bug spray in my mouth…I’d probably do it again. Corporate gigs pay really well:)

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